We all thought of this question at least once in our life time “how to change somebody?” This is normal, because we are not always happy with everything in our life. When we are not happy with something, we immediately begin to look for a reason.
Usually, there are two reasons: things and peopleJ. It’s easier to manage with the first reason, it gets difficult to cope with the second.
So, how do we change other people?
We are sure that after reading next paragraph, about 40-50% of readers will close this page. But if you are really determined to change everyone around you, then read this article to the end.
Now, the most powerful and effective advice that will help us change any person:
To change another person, we need to change ourselves.
Disappointed? Have you already heard or read about it?
Yes, this advice is not new and not everyone can understand its meaning. Let’s try to elaborate this.
“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
– Leo Tolstoy.
Why do we need to start with ourselves?
There are two reasons for that:
- We cannot teach another person to be better than us.
“Never try to make others what you did not manage to become yourself.”
– Richard Aldington
- The things we want to change in others, we should first change within ourselves.
“A good way to discover your shortcomings is to find something that irritates you in others.” – Anthony de Mello
Yes, we best see our shortcomings in others. It is difficult to understand and accept, but it we look deeper in ourselves, we’ll know it is true.
“If we had no faults of our own, we would not take so much pleasure in noticing them in others.”
– François de La Rochefoucauld
Everything begins with ourselves. When we become better, we are less irritated by the actions and words of others. It’s explainable and clear. However, this is not the only result. Somehow, other people’s behavior change as well.
“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.”
– Mahatma Gandhi